Cousin Balki heaven for PC users

I have discovered a treasure troph with the potential to take all jaded parts of my personality and wipe them clean. The hater in me could actually die. If I only I had a PC. (Curses Apple, your streamlined asthetics have foiled me again!) In2tv, Aol's little tv downloady site has a vintage section with episodes of my favorite shows as a kid. I'm serious, when Welcome Back Kotter first came on Nick at Night, it was shown at 4am, and I would go to sleep and have an alarm set for 4am so I could wake up and watch it. (I don't know why I didn't just tape it....) On In2tv, such delights as Welcome Back, Kotter, Perfect Strangers, Growing Pains, Our Gang, Animaniacs, Pinky and the Brain, and Wonder Woman are ripe for the picking. Unfortunately, I missed this when I sold my soul to Apple. Will someone with a PC please enjoy Balki bailing Larry out after one of his hairbrained scemes goes awry for me? I promise it will be rich with slapstick and cultural misunderstandings.

If you, too, are a Mac user, you'll just have to settle for a page of Balki-isms, like this classic: "Well rub my chest and call me Vix"